iammantooth

2009-09-04T20:33:00.000-07:00

NERDS

2008-05-22T21:24:00.000-07:00

do you want a good time?
do you want your world rocked?
do you want to see a donkey show?
well then go to tj and fuck yourself.

if you want to kick it with some cool girls
here are two that will be in your home town.
hang out
drink brew.
take photos.
pluck_it@hotmail.com

welcome

2008-05-22T20:53:00.000-07:00

slap the taste out your own mouth
187 your own self
put your own nuts on your own tonsils
check your own self

2007-05-26T11:04:00.000-07:00

well its summer time agian.
that special time that only comes but once a year.
what have you done to get the most out of this magical, enchanted time.
its time to get hot... flaming hot.
this is the face of a man who had a lot of whiskey the night before but not even being the second most drunk he has ever been could keep him from the DADS ARE RAD weekend
someone with the nickname OLDBALLS lives here.
the sunsets only once every 24 hours. thats only 364 times a year. the sun gets down alot actually.in fact it has got down 9215 times in my life. i wish i got down that much.
whats sad is that the seattle mairiners mascot is a moose. what the hell.
fuck mooses

mayor of margaritaville

2007-04-27T14:50:00.000-07:00

have you ever been to margaritaville? if you have your mind might be blown away. you probably dont remember the soft white sand, the lushes palm trees, the exotic native woman wearing only cocanut shells. do you remember now?
well if you dont it most likely because you didnt meet the mayor of margaritavile. he is the one that turns the vivid imagry one man speaks and sings of into the realest reality you have ever expierienced. i met him. im still hung over.

he is so epic that he gave himself the name delisiuos

here is his brother wishing he was the mayor. what a buster

these guys heard saw and smelled. maybe felt and for sure tasted.

2007-04-10T18:35:00.000-07:00

so mantooth made it into a gallery.
no not himself silly,
something he made.
it only got in because it was the tallest thing submitted.
go big or go home.
i think i want to go home.
the 19th sounds good.

2007-04-03T23:12:00.000-07:00

"abrababbababarbabrbababrrbabrbrbaba"
(this is the letters used to spell the sound that is made when you do what peter is doing in this photo)

"hi im dumb. dont you want to talk to me? no? why? i love you though. it wont ever happen again. i swear. it meant nothing.
its not you its me."

"neiner neiner neiner you cant get me. im rubbeer your glue whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you. im telling mom."

2007-04-03T23:09:00.000-07:00

IM BACK BABY! WHAT A PIECE! ILIKE THAT!

2007-03-28T01:09:00.000-07:00

in case you were wondering the toilet is filled with black liquid because snakes dont be yellow. they pee venom. and every one knows venom is black. if it aanit black its wack.
dont be wack

black hole son

2007-03-28T01:04:00.000-07:00

wont you come
so i know every one including justin timberlake and mandy more indulge on the shit i put on this thing
so i thought all you A-celebraties would like a self portrait of mantooth peeing. cheers

2007-03-28T00:41:00.000-07:00

one day back when mantooth was just boytooth he was doing some work at olys house and he desperatly needed some music to help the construction of the green room go by better.

the only one home was olys roomate. the one the only the mucho bonita heather. she offered me some tunes to the degree of acdc.

i gladly accepted. she brought out a cd player and a cd. it was dirty deeds. she said it was her favorite. i said ok.

from that day on i have told myself i must have a girl like that. i will gladly put timber talk into timber walk for any lady that will play me some bon scott scrething, angus twanging, noise pollution. but it aint no fun waiting around to be a millionare so thats why i say Mr art vandely is one lucky dude. he is already rich.

so cheers to the enco girls. hannah bartie is awesome.

2007-03-27T22:27:00.000-07:00

this is mantooths gift to the internet. with the addition of these photos the world wide web just got a whole lot better.

this is what you need to do

1. wish you lived in portland

2. wish you played or pretended to play a intrument

3. take pictures of yourself

4.drink some venom

5. blah blah blah

6.why do i have more hair on my left boob then my right boob? i mean pecktoral. and there super buff to. i can do like 50 sit ups. and i can kick your ass at a jumping jack contest. so what? pooppooopoopoopopopopopopoooopoooppooppoop

heres one for the spank bank

2007-03-26T13:02:00.000-07:00

this one time

2007-03-26T12:38:00.000-07:00

found these on the street
they must have fallen out of some
stock broakers briefcase as he was hurring
off to a important meeting with some
fancy client where he wiill use his
palm piolet as a vibrator
and then call his kids on his blackberry
and tell them he hates them.

2007-03-25T18:53:00.000-07:00

snakeseatfools.blogspot.com

\bringing sexy back
almost like me and your mama
except that will never happen
not because she is not good enough for me
but because im not good enough for her.
drink it up boys.

worlds worst blogger

2007-03-25T18:42:00.000-07:00

if you want to know how to suck just read on.
browse through this large pile of shit.
use the down button or if you have one of those fancy mouses with the little spinning thing on it, just use that.
or if you would like to know how to become a poop face just like mantooth i will let you know.
suck
poop
pee
drink cheap venom
pretented you are doing something for a good reason
make crap
poop some more
pick popcorn out of your teeth
take pictures
put them on the computer
then write some words.
mostly when you are drunk and honest because who is honest when they are not drunk lets make pretend then fuck.

2007-03-25T18:32:00.000-07:00

what inspires you?
dogs that can catch frisbees?
boobs?
wait. inspire what?
living?
moving?
getting out of bed?
hey i cant hear you, my dicks to big.

i mean small.

darn. i have a huge truck. its lifted.
got froading.

2007-03-10T13:55:00.000-08:00

between the legs ....what krary

peter and amanda are very nice people. they drive far distances to make others happy.

o side to p town and then back down. too fast? yes. too good? yes.

love it or leave it

it had to be done

thanks guys

ENCO...STAY UP PLAYERS
I LOVE YOU.

2007-03-02T12:28:00.000-08:00

here is a little tip. almost like trick tips. but for you high tech wanna bes out there.

first. use your left little finger and hold the button that says ctrl. it is located on the lower left corner of your keyboard

second. presss the button that says alt. use the ring finger on your left hand because this one is right next to the ctrl button.

third. you should be holding the buttons from step 1 and2 still and now for the grand finally...with your right hand, any finger will do, press the delete button. hip hip horray. you did it. now go brush your teath

2007-02-24T12:43:00.000-08:00

brew hella holar hand

2007-02-17T02:39:00.000-08:00

what do you want? i dont think you neeed me to explain.

now if you really want t talk, i am a large fan of timber talk and the last time i checked i was the only dude tn the entire world that is in to timber talk now a days. so just to let you know. school is forkid rock loving smucks.

johnny is back. "shy dont you marry it"

did you get married. secret. hawaii? vegas? why does runing away and getting married have a special word used to describe the action of being drunk and doing something you will regret for the rest of your life.

if i had 2 words left before i expired, they wouldn not be i do. snakes eat fool,
spit them out iinto a bloody puddle andwash them up and thake them home to meet mommy

pbr vs pb&j

2007-02-12T18:58:00.000-08:00

we all have eaten it

wwe all have drank it

now this is what you have to try
go to target and buy yourself a blender
add 1 cup peanut butter
1 cup jelly
1 hamburger bun
and 6 cans of fun

next thing you know you will know how to fly

and maybe your life will start to not be as lame as college womens basketball

or maybe mantooth is lame and smelly

shout out section

watson good looks on the cast

jwood aka skelator, hows castle grayskull?

o dawg. brew bro birth bash blu ball bettie

johnny......where the hell have you been?
are we still cool?
it was just an accident.
i promise.

2007-02-06T22:09:00.000-08:00

pussy ain't got no face

2006-12-30T11:32:00.000-08:00

2006-12-21T17:05:00.000-08:00

who is ART?

2006-12-14T02:15:00.000-08:00

i am still looking for this guy named art? do you know him? where is he?
is he a gay? does he get lots of chicks? i want to meet him.

jp to sd

2006-12-14T02:05:00.000-08:00

watch out one
watch out all
joe going to sd
he is radder then you
he be da bomb

photo time

2006-12-12T21:56:00.000-08:00

what is time? why do we have it?
to see how lazy we are? to show how long we can sit on our ass and watch tv?
to show how unreliable skateboarders are?
will there ever be a shred that starts on time?
maybe when skateboard become extinked because of global warming and every one starts aggressive in-lining.
i ride for jamba juice fruit chew tabaco.
thats what time it is.
the price is wrong.
bitch.

single and ready to mingle

2006-12-10T23:18:00.000-08:00

24 white male (i look even younger)
athletic, sexy! classy, romantic,
artistic, attractive,open-minded,
honest, sincere, intelligent,
i enjoy cultural events, working
out, dancing, movies, dining.
seeking soul-mate, outdoor
woman, down to earth, with
similar interests, who enjoys
cuddling and massages.
must have big boobs.

get some

2006-12-03T13:33:00.000-08:00

some are born with it
some have to work for it
some strive to perfect it

we all know 2nd place is the first loser.
so what are you going to do?

day 31

2006-11-21T19:09:00.000-08:00

well ladies and gentalmen it looks like mantooth had a pretty easy time with this challange. not only was it easy, it escalated mantooth into celebrity status. i heard he is going to have a signature shoe coming out from Pro-wing. so do your self a favor and pick up a copy of the sunday edition of the orgonian. thats right, all you have to do to get noticed in this god damn hippie town is wear a shirt with a moose on it for a month. imagine if i wore it for a year... i might become govoner. viva la hippieness/legalize it/why does it rain so much...to make somedank ass buds and fuckin shrooms/ peace and love to all

day 420

2006-11-17T20:27:00.000-08:00

watch out. danger. beware. caution. hazard.
dont trip. dont forget. tie a string around your finger.
you will die. weather that will involv a giant hot dog is up to you.
for me....im prepared. i brushed my teeath, combed my hair, trimed my nails, q tiped my ears, old spiced my armpits, changed my underwear, put on fresh socks, had a cup of coffee and read my horoscope.

it said

today is the day.. your time is up.. your ship has come in and it is full of fireworks, set um off, spark it, literally light a fire.
see what happens. maybe it will involve a giant hotdog.

day 20

2006-11-10T20:56:00.000-08:00

Polar bear vs slash(the real one not splash hansome)
godzilla vs carzilla
r2d2 pez despencer vs roccy and bulwinkel
robo cop vs walker texas ranger
andrea the giant vs mike v
moose vs mantooth
100% juice vs 100% juiced

day 19

2006-11-09T21:03:00.000-08:00

look at mantooth. 19 hard days of looking completly knock down beautiful in the same shirt and still absalutely gorgous. the last 2 days have been some of his more productive days. they were spent hunched over in his bed puking his moose guts out into a bucket. if you have ever heard of the beer moose drull this is were it comes from. it is also the main ingrideant in moose tracks ice cream. so if your saying to yourself right now "damn this guy is sexy" you might be right. in fact after a recent independent survey you might be amoung the .00000003407 percentile who would love to spend a night cuddling with the moose antlers.

day 16 i think

2006-11-06T22:31:00.000-08:00

hey since all my cyber buddies are blowing it and dont keep up to the minute with the light speed of the techno plasam information highway, mantooth thought he would take a few days off to bask in the pouring rain of portland oregon. or maybe that is why mantoooth has become such a cybeer fuck. rain + college+ retardedness= gay out on the mac attack. at least mantooth dosent have to worry about what he is going to wear tomorrow.

day 13

2006-11-03T21:05:00.000-08:00

yo im pooped

all my lov
my darling
i hunger for your touch
time goes by so slowly....

day 12

2006-11-03T21:03:00.000-08:00

sorry no photo. i was to caught up in godfather 2. mike goes nuts. no ones safe, not even family.

day11

2006-11-01T19:29:00.000-08:00

the shirt has not left mantooths body for over 3 days. he no longer takes showers, he rubs up against pine trees. his hair is dreding. mantooth is one with the land. one with nature. one with your mom.

day10

2006-10-31T20:12:00.000-08:00

go touch your halloweener

day 9

2006-10-30T20:58:00.000-08:00

yo yo yo. im sponsered. i got a phat package today. oh ya 9 days bitches. boobies are definetly a love of mine. speaking of boobies, the reason mantooth is going to art school is going down tomorrow. nude (female)(boobies)(.)(.) figure drawing. the only thing i have to figure out is who the hell is this guy named art that every one is talking about.

day 8

2006-10-29T18:41:00.000-08:00

day 7

2006-10-28T10:50:00.000-07:00

day 6

2006-10-27T20:01:00.000-07:00

mantooth 6 days in with some moose drull.

winning isnt everything, its the only thing
here are some ways you can be a winner.

1. go get a big mac, super size it, then go to your local skatepark and site on the deck of a ramp and let your feet dangle into the ramp. then stuff your face and vomit all over the flat bottom.

2.go buy a ford truck then go to work early and work late. only ford truck drivers know the real way to neglect their family because they are ford tough.

3.go vote. prop. 69 is trying to make fruit loops the national cereal. also on the ballat is the legilation that bans the term hella. if this passes and you are heard describing your northern california buds with this word you will be tied down and farted on by sick dogs.

4.change your clock. not back but move it forward an hour or even an hour and a half. dont let someone tell you what to do. i thought you were punk rock. you have a penis but you wear girls pants. you dont brush your hair. your crazy.

day 5

2006-10-26T11:11:00.000-07:00

its starting to smell.
hows the myspase self taken photo?
the proper response would be dumb.

day 4

2006-10-25T22:06:00.000-07:00

4 beers for day 4. mantooth got a b+ on his art history paper. that shit is tight if i dont say so myself. i thought for sure they would have kick mantooth ass out of school by now. go get a job.

day 3

2006-10-24T20:13:00.000-07:00

day 3
mantooths sceaming mind has come up with the latest attempt to afford his snake venom habit....
mantooths moose shirt marathon
you can now be a part of the month long mayham right along side mantooth as he goes 30 days of wearing the same shirt. school, skating, bars, peeing and farting are all happening while wearing only this shirt. and now you can be a part of it. here is what you do.... make a pledge of any thing you want. $1 a day. $100 a day. a beer a day. what ever you want. and what you will get in return is something pricless....mantooth will wear a post-it note with any thing you want it to say on it, right on his shit next to the moose for one whole day. make it say your name. make it say boobs. make it say what ever the hell you want. or send mantooth a photo of yourself and he will put your face right there next to the moose. all this for one small pledge.your post it note or photo will even be featured on mantooths daily photo journal. so make your pledge today.
email questions to moose3382@hotmail.com
lets make it happen.

day 2

2006-10-23T22:57:00.000-07:00

day 2 was great. the moose powers helped me do homework all fucking day long.

day 1

2006-10-22T16:12:00.000-07:00

i hope all you out there like this shirt as much as mantooth because he has been challenged to wear it for 1 month straight. only removing it to bathe or bang. this was actually day 3 of wearing it but the first day of the challenge. rawr.

MOOSE-TASTIC

2006-10-19T14:09:00.000-07:00

the moose antlers have been sharpened. the moose musk is stenching. the moose hair is shaggy.
the moose is complete.

2006-10-19T12:28:00.001-07:00

aerosmith smealt it....that means they dealt it.

make some coffe, drink it, leave the cofee maker on, leave your house, slide down a grassy hill on some ice.

2006-10-19T12:28:00.000-07:00

aerosmith smealt it....that means they dealt it.

make some coffe, drink it, leave the cofee maker on, leave your house, slide down a grassy hill on some ice.

2006-10-12T01:03:00.000-07:00

joe raps

words would not do these photos justice. there is no way to describe what happened with this guy and this girl at this bar.

all im gonna say is she is missing a tooth.

FORK

2006-10-04T23:18:00.000-07:00

triple dare or ultimate challenge?

2006-10-04T12:11:00.000-07:00

here is your mission.

1. log into iammantooth
username: iamantooth
password: mantooth

2. post a blog on iammantooth with a photo of either...
a. your ass
b.your boobs
c. your girlfriends boobs

3.if i can guess within 24 hours of the posting who you are by the photo and caption, you owe me a 40.
if i cant guess i owe you a 40.

4. feel free to post as many times as you want. just remember that the penis goes in the vagina.

2006-10-03T17:21:00.000-07:00

hmm, interesting...

boxers or briefs????

2006-09-30T20:16:00.000-07:00

i think i will select briefs. briefcase that is. it is not something i will support my junk with but it is something i will putt my junk in. girls get ready. here we come.
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nerds are coming.
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clear the women and children from the streets.
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if you happen to see a grown man with a sharpie tally mark on his arm you better run fof the hills.
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kjh
fgds
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sdf
fas
tr5

090
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6555

suck it oliveer

Mantooth versus MLB

2006-09-30T19:39:00.000-07:00

MLB? Mantooth has been there mantooth has done dat. as long as we refer to mlb as major league bitches. penate races hes wun division titles he accomplished. world seriezes hes concurred. all uv whut wuz just said is the most fabricated story of dhe year but on a true note. the 2006 SD Padres aka "da dads" just clinched a play off spot. Oliver, you going downskjd. Hanna Bartie, here we go. Dodger fans fuck off.

8 inch rule

2006-09-19T22:50:00.000-07:00

have you ever wanted to be the king of a castle?
have you ever wanted to have a pyrimid built for your lifeless body to rott away in?
have you ever wanted to rule?
if you answered yes to any of these, go see how many scolding axel nuts you can fit in your ass hole.

here is the only rule you need to know to rule your life.
the 8 inch rule. if your dick isnt 8 inches you need not apply.
just fucking with you.
the 8 inch rule is simple. the 8 inch rule is true.
right now,how far is the closest beer to you?
if it is less then 8 inches you rule
if it is more then 8 inches, you fail life, you failing blogging, you fail. you dont rule. go kill some bunnys.
art vandaley is some what responsible for the 8 inch rule. so do your self a favor and check his shit out. its undeer the bitches link.
dont sit, dont drull.
keep it 8 inches, you'll rule.

new socks

2006-09-19T22:31:00.000-07:00

new socks are great, right? so very confortable.they make you feel like a kid going back to school. they leave your feet saying thank you...... they leave your feet saying wash all this fucking lint off of me. what the hell? why do new socks make your feet loook liike they have herpies? with all the technology in the world, why cant someone inventt the lintless sock. how are you gonna pull chicks with all this shit on your feet? where does it all go? does it pile up at the bottom of your sheets on your bed to form a giant new sock lint ball that someday is going to eat you?

here is mantooth. class of 2000. o yeah bitch face. el camino high school. oh yaah, just in case you were wondering, this guy is a college student. smoke footie. circa bootleg video 2024

denise the piece

2006-09-16T14:41:00.000-07:00

what a lovely photo. is it a mother and son vacation photo? nope. is it a younger brother and his older sister having some beach time photo? nope. is it a horney mother of 2 with a dude she meet while being completly intoxicated in catalina? yep. is the married friend of this lady giving some random guy a blowjob in the bathroom right now? yep. are these ladies kids no more then 10 feet away watching their drunk mom buy beers for a group of 6 dudes? yep. there is nothing like good parenting.

2006-09-02T18:47:00.000-07:00

this is a shout out to my peeps in this foto.

mr joe r prior. good fella. the r stands for radical. not ralph.

then there is this girl in the foto. i owe her a lot. and im not talking just about money. she has helped put the man in mantooth. thanks for putting up with me for as long as you did.

2006-09-02T17:00:00.000-07:00

mason st. snakes hoodie. vista. last year. eyes shut.jake? Joy. mantooth. beard? coors full body. smoke footie.

seein peein

2006-08-22T23:18:00.000-07:00

there are a few things in this world that will always be funny no matter how old you are, what kind of job you have, or who you hang out with. little fat bald men, farting, sweat pants, white fools rapping. these are all classics. one of mantooths personal favorites is people peeing outside. well maybe not the act of peeing outside but more the fact that everyone can watch you pee. it cracks me up. girls peeing outside is even better. nothing sexual just straight humur. oh baby baby.

2006-08-17T17:23:00.000-07:00

go do yourself a favor and hang out in a honey bucket. write on the walls. have a cup of coffee. it will be fun.

2006-07-29T20:25:00.000-07:00

mantooth wants you.
do you want mantooth?
he wants to turn sad into rad
do you want to turn sad into rad?
for a limited time mantooth is selling himself.
you tell him what you want and you got it.
do you want a briefcase full of mustard?
do you want original mantooth art?
your choice between drunk or sober art.
you got options.
and the best thing is, mantooth excepts all sorts of payment.
old socks, tree bark, BEER, home videos, whatever.
here is the addreess. send whatever you want and let mantooth know
what you want.
2020 sw salmon st. #105
portland OR 97205
just in case, mantooths shoe size is 9 and his favorite perfume is ck1.
lets do this.

small hearted kid

2006-07-26T00:31:00.000-07:00

drink it fom a can, a bottle, a pitcher. this one goes out to watson. your ass might be busted but you will always be a brother. scott wright has noting on the snakes, your definetly like a fine wine, you get better with age. the skating is tight but the person is tighter. im glad i got to grow up across the street from you. now go ice your balls. happy birthday.

2006-07-24T14:53:00.000-07:00

2006-07-24T14:46:00.000-07:00

dont be gellouse

2006-07-24T04:06:00.000-07:00

dont be gellouse. if you were to drink mantooths piss out of a pickle jar you we get drunker then you have ever been in your life. if you just look at mantooth it would be like pouring tj finest tequila in your eyes. mantooth dosent sleep. mantooth passes out. a mometary rest for the rest of earth. go im yourself on myspace then go dump yourself.

is that it?

2006-07-24T01:45:00.000-07:00

consider it done johnny boy. the real qeustion is are you really gonna give me my monnnaaaa for not cutting this fucking rug on my naggin. see this photo... it was taken in triple digit haet. thats right i love heat and meat and triple digit and magnets that hold up pictures of apsalutely meaningless shit. j-rock claimed to be drunk since 84, and that is tight. manttoooth... drunk since '82. yoayooyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo what else do you want me to say? ok, i admit it, i got some news to tell the world. this is the offical press relese that lets all you magnum P.I. wanna bes that the snakes eat fools. if you dont belive me then google it. i triple dog dare you. and im totally being patric melcher right now.

cybeer time

2006-07-21T23:28:00.000-07:00

hello out there. this is another adition of mantooooooth. if you think about it its real crazy how this whole inter demensional web shit works. its kind of like teenage mutane ninja turtles and the whole krane thing with toxic oooozzz and foot soldiers. i can take a picture of my ass right now and post it on this shit and in 2 seconds every one in the world can see my lame butt. so from this point on im going to take requests. you tell me what you want to see and i will produce. girls? i'll post um. dudes? i'll post um. midgets fingerboarding on the mega ramp? i'll post it. you tell me and cybeer time will take over. i defietly have nothing better to do, trust me im lame. ok now go doo your self a favor and shotgun a beer out of monsters sawed off.

moose pooping

2006-07-21T01:03:00.000-07:00

dont act like a moose dont shit in the woods. whatever your a waste of life. i found this while working my fuck filled job at the airprot where i soon found taht i hate everyone. sure they gave me free flights to sd but what did that get me? only wanting to move backl home, only wanting to slither with the snakes more, only wanting to see my brothers go through high school with out being jock ass fuck face son of a bitches. yeah working 9;45 PM TO 8:30 AM SUCKS but it showed me that snakes eat fools....is mantooth a fool? when ios the last time you drank a beer and crushed the can on your head? thats what i thought. go join a frat and kill yourself you lonely ass meth smokin fart smelling sdsu going barney!

this made my girl not happy

2006-07-21T00:34:00.000-07:00

this photo has really no caption. what this photo is meant to do is make your imagination run wild. i know what i saw, what joe saw, what maygirl saw, what joy saw. wjat do you think we saw? boobies? noonies? both? you be the judge. this shit happens once in a life time and im glad i had my camera.

enlightenment!!

2006-07-21T00:10:00.000-07:00

so you smoke the ganjah. real cool. you get high. you get ireeeee. you go to the green room. but when was the last time you got enlightenment:? NEVER! thats what i thought you cock smoking, wanna be hippie, smelling ass, berkinstock wearing, greatfuldead listening trolls. if you are alive in 2006 and are dumb enough to smoke weed then you probably listen to insane clown posse or the kotten mouth kings. therefor your life has no meaning and you should be sent to iraq and shoot. why dont you do your self a farvor and go for a long walk on a short dogs dick and inject a piosoness splinter in your butt hole.

myspase me your camel cash you twat

2006-07-20T23:52:00.000-07:00

so mantooth has been in ptown for a few months. do you think this stoped the camel cash collectioN? FUCK NO YOU CRACKED OUT HATERS! 1,668 is the number of c-notes that mantooooooth has got in his possession since leaving the fucked up high paced rich ass hummer driving botox injecting real estate rate race of southern california. in other words your pretty much as usefull as a broken guitar strign and mantoooth is so tigfht he might just run for president. fuck president, im goonnna be the ruler of earth. a wise alliean once told a good friend of min e the sicret of the universe, and that was the ingredients of ranch dressing. that man was johnhy joonnhy john mcguiere;ldksjhfkl;asjd;lfkja;l. i have no idea how to spell his mill- town, wanna be greek name but all i want you to know is he rules earth right now. if you win the lottery slash power ball, you might only have enough money to buy one fith of his awesomeness. point of the story, go give yourself a paper cut on your dick.

2006-07-20T22:36:00.000-07:00

sepia... what the fuck does that mean? this is what it means to mantooth... go ride a b ike, be a fucktard, get dumped, be even more of a fucktard, fuck ridint=g a bbike, ride a hiuman, fuck riding a human, ride a skateboard that your friend gave you because your to poor to buy one, shred, shralp, gnar gnar,make a lame ass video with the only good shit being joe mother fucking prior, smoke sigs on the roof by yourself, wish you were in oside wish the padres would win, wish hannah bartie would call me and make me happy just to hear her awsome voice, wish i had 1000000000000 bbeeers in my fridge, fuck you if your reading this, all it is is trash, all mantooth is is trash, thanks for wasting time, thats what the www.fuckfuckfuckcukcfuckfuckfuckfuckfucklfuckfuckfucklfukcufklcjcufikfkaefhlkldjf;kajhdfg;kjj.com is for right?

my roomate is better then you

2006-07-20T17:31:00.000-07:00

he can dance better then you

he can take pictures of himself at sunrise better then you

he can have a beard better then you

go ride a human

2006-07-20T17:01:00.000-07:00

go away right now. dont run. dont drive. dont even think about riding a horse. this is what your going to do. be a fucking dumb ass jerkface poo poo head, drink cans and cans of juice, and ride off into the sunset on a human. if you do this then maybe one day you could be a mantooth.

mr potato head

2006-07-01T16:03:00.000-07:00

little girls sholudnt have tatoos, big noses, bushy eye brows, mustaches or glasses. and they definetly shouldnt be smoking.

mantooth boozing it up. shocking huh?

jp quote of the night. "im already part jewish, why do i need to wear this?"

special places

2006-06-30T21:49:00.000-07:00

what makes something special? is it because thats what your mom said? is it because every one is different? is solo special time ok? will i go blind? why is special time with someone else so much specialer? will you be special with mantooth?

ZAT

2006-06-27T14:24:00.000-07:00

who cares about what your sat score was. what did that ever get you. what is really important is zat. zima amplitude test! yeah people have tried to get extreme with the xxx but this one lady on this one night took it to the limits. heres how she got the perfect score...
1.spent hours studying with zima
2.rode a bike of a curb to face plant thinking of zima
3.jumped over a hand rail straight to an atomic knee drop tring to get to her zima
4.got extreme in the parking lot with her zima
5.drank 10000000 onces of zima in one sitting

the 10 stages of a sparkathon

2006-06-12T11:54:00.000-07:00

1.pre spark warm-up
2.pre spark
3.spark
4.post spark cooldown
5.post spark
6.pre secondary spark warmup
7.pre secondary spark
8.secondary serius spark
9.post secondary spark cooldown
10.pass out spark

now that you know the stages, witch stage is man tooth at in these photos?

first one to come correct gets a free package o crap

2006-05-08T12:35:00.000-07:00

"rub-a-dub-dub, 3 men in a tub."

"tight quarters requires tight MANeuvers."

"No shirts... Yes service!"

"Dude, your ass is in my crotch"

"100% male"

"0% female"

"reverse oreo"

"hold me and dont ever let go."

"we gotta get laid before the sun goes down."

"why does the black guy always got to be in the middle?"

"MANwhich...umm"

"i guess i will just say i was drunk"

"Is your hand on my leg?"
"gross!"
"sweet!"

"i wanna be in front"

"where the fuck is J-Rocks hand?"

"and why is he smiling so much?"

"does this make me a gay?"

"the footy is gonna be tight."

"i have always wanted to have a 3 some"

"BOOM-Shaka-Laka"

2006-04-25T19:02:00.000-07:00

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
SOMEONE ONCE SAID
"THIS SHIP IS DEFINETLY SINKING"
I THINK WHAT HE REALLY MEANT
WAS THAT
THIS SHIP IS DEFINETLY STINKING.
TAKE A SHOWER YOU DIRTY HIPPIE.
BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
BLAH BLAH BLAH

2006-04-17T17:43:00.000-07:00

FOR IMMEDIEATE RELEASE
April 17, 2006

2006
PENTATHALON
Oceanside vs. Encinitas

Since the beginning of time there has been territorial battles. Wars, corruption, chaos, suicide bombings, jihad gorilla attacks and much more have all been part of the never ending battle of home land pride. Today I am pleased to announce an event so magnificent that there finally may be an end to this neighboring city bickering over supremacy. This event has been established to put to rest the question of who is number one and who is just plane busted.

This will be a one day event with the date to be determined according to participants availability. There are five events: Badminton, Soccer, Dodge Ball, Horseshoes, and Karaoke. One point will be awarded to the winning team of each event. There will be Five players to a team. The official rules will be discussed during a meeting with both teams.

2006-03-11T22:10:00.000-08:00

i would write a caption for this photo but there is nothing i could say that his face doesn't. so i guess what you will get to read is a excerpt from mantooths thoughts...."electrical poles aren't really poles. they are huge trees with no leafs. they are the biggest trees around. all other real trees are dwarfs. but they do have leafs and they still have roots. but squirrels can still climb on electrical poles. i have seen it."

2006-03-10T12:00:00.000-08:00

A wager has been set. the only question is can mantooth do it? $100 for not cutting the mantooth mane until NERDS GONE CORPORATE? stay tuned in to see. $100 buys a lot of beer.....

GIVE 'ER !!

2006-03-09T11:06:00.000-08:00

GIVE 'ER !!

the art of the beer shotgun is a lot like firing a real shotgun. it takes disipline, strength, and many hours of practice to master. mantooth is not the best beer shotguner you will ever meet. in fact he should have his hunting licence taken away. he gets more beer on his shirt then in his mouth. and he has a big mouth, you might say its man sized. if you could take all the beer that is wasted from poor shotgunning at any random frat party, you would be able to get the whole gama alpha gama house drunk. the point of the story is be careful out there. we dont need any more accidents like are good old vice president had.

2006-03-09T10:39:00.000-08:00

--------------------------------MANTOOTH FOR HIRE!!!-----------------------------

2006-03-06T14:18:00.000-08:00

MANTOOTH has the latest center spread in Gluttons Digest for his self indulgence on his birthday.

productivity killed the cat

2006-03-05T00:15:00.000-08:00

so here is a bit of what mantooth has been up to in the few months of trying to better his pitiful life. fuck censorship. actually dont fuck censorship. or if you want you can. whatever dude...your busted.

i think you can ride skateboard on this thing

2006-02-12T11:51:00.000-08:00

mantooth likes the kings. mantooth likes riding skateboards. mantooth likes riding skateboards while wearing kings jerseys.

mantooth goes tribal

2006-01-13T21:16:00.000-08:00

"Africa, you did the damn thing!!"

happy hour

2006-01-12T17:26:00.000-08:00

how often do you go to a bar and see the signs for happy hour? OFTEN! but the true question is how often do you get to expirence the true benifits of the happy hour? does it really make you happy? is it just one hour? well mantooth feels your concerns and wants to help. he took time out of his busy schedule to find some answers to these important questions.
first of all happy hour lasts a lot longer then 1 hour. 2-5 in most cases. somtimes more, sometimes less. next, does it make you happy? let me ask you this.... does 10 beers for $15 dollars make you happy? well for mantooth it makes his teath shine. there are some unseen benifits as well, such as 40 year old strung out women giving you money to play steely dan on the junk box. happy hour makes mantooth happy.

2006-01-10T21:07:00.000-08:00

mantooth eats fools

2006-01-05T10:16:00.000-08:00

Sometimes you eat the bar...sometimes the bar eats you